Love on the Spectrum: Dating
with Autism

Valentine’s Day is around the corner and love is in the air, so we decided to check in with one of our favorite couples. Autumn Wolfe and Emmett Stoner have been dating for 19 months, and they were eager to share their experiences with love on the spectrum. Dating with autism can be challenging, but finding the right someone makes it worth the effort.

Signs of a Healthy Relationship

Autumn and Emmett shared some of their previous dating experiences and why things didn’t work. They also shared reasons this relationship is different from their previous dating experiences. In our video chat, we give examples of signs of a healthy relationship, which include:

  • Your family likes the other person.
  • The two of you have many things in common.
  • Your partner respects your relationships with others. It’s a red flag if someone is continually telling you who you can spend time with.
  • Good communication and the ability to talk things out and work through disagreements. 
  • Showing empathy for each other. This can be challenging for many on the spectrum, so pay attention to cues and ask your partner how they feel.
  • Treat each other with respect. 
  • Learn from your mistakes and take responsibility. Take ownership for your actions and know when to apologize.
  • Take interest in each other’s hobbies, and make compromises. Do things that the other person likes, and vice versa.

Dating Advice for Love on the Spectrum

We closed our conversation with Autumn and Emmett sharing their dating advice for others. Emmet encourages everyone to make sure you’re dating for the right reasons! Don’t settle for dating someone just because you don’t want to be alone. He encourages you to take it slow, find common interests with others, talk to them, and become friends first.

dating on the spectrum

Autumn’s advice to those looking for love on the spectrum is to remember to communicate calmly. When you have a disagreement, take a breather, agree to step away to calm down, and then talk about the issue when you are both ready. If the person is worth fighting for they will be there to talk through anything.

You can’t rush love, but you can encourage it by meeting others and making new friendships. You never know where a new relationship could take you! To learn more about transitioning into adulthood with autism, check out the resources in our video library.

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